Gifts To Please the Characters On Your List

Mrs. Claus (the happy homemaker) – she's just like Martha Stewart, only without the criminal record or the millions. If those chili-smeared sweatpants aren't doing anything for her looks, boost her kitchen wardrobe with an uber-pretty girlish apron from Anthropologie (from $28 US at www.anthropologie.com). Since she's probably too busy canning her own pickles to venture out to the theatre, get her the Julie and Julia DVD ($23.99 at www.amazon.ca; released Dec. 8). Or add to her dazzling cookbook collection with the "stomach-satisfying, visually-gratifying, fresh-mouthed" new cookbook Bite Me by Toronto sisters Julie Albert and Lisa Gnat ($23.96 at www.chapters.indigo.ca)

Jingle Belle (the enviable fashionista) – girls want to buy her a ski mask. Men want to buy her a festive thong. Neither is appropriate. A blow, however, is. A gift certificate to Blo Blow Dry Bar (in Vancouver and Toronto), will ensure her hair stays red-carpet ready (from $31 at www.blomedry.com). A regular handbag is a gamble, but you can keep her fitness fashion up-to-date with Lululemon's new Lucky Tote ($98 at www.lululemon.com). Or give her a sweets fix without the dreaded calories via Philosophy's Bake Shoppe ($30 US at www.sephora.com), a collection of yummy scented bath products.

The Blitzen (the alcohol appreciator) – perpetually red nosed and jolly, during the holidays he's usually got an impressive dried rum 'n eggnog collection suspended in his moustache. This character will love a set of Whiskey Stones ($19.99 US at www.thinkgeek.com), soapstone ice cube imitators that cool a glass of single malt without melting, or The Hourglass Cocktail Shaker ($49 US at www.restorationhardware.com), which confirms that it's always happy hour. He told you so!

The Ghost of Christmas Past (the elderly relative) – the challenge: old timers have already accumulated everything they want. But the things they actually need (like supplies to tackle incontinence) don't score high on the joyous present meter. Here are two remaining options: for the Granny who has lost the ability to differentiate between cat hair and the rug, there's the new iRobot Roomba 562 Pet Series ($445.64 at www.robotshop.ca), a robotic vacuum that specializes in picking up animal debris. Meanwhile, Grandpa will be instantly catapulted to cool kid status at the care home with an "Old People Rock" t-shirt featuring a rocking chair ($26.30 at www.zazzle.ca).

The Elf (the man child) – though over forty, he's successfully avoiding a) doing his own laundry and b) dating women his own age. And despite the fact that he already had armpit hair when Atari came on the scene, you can bet he'll still get hyper over a Nintendo DSi ($179.99 at www.toysrus.ca) or The Beatles Rock Band Limited Edition ($249.99 at www.futureshop.ca).

The Grinch (the sullen teen) – the only thing more painful than choking on a turkey bone is having to endure grumpy adolescents throughout the holidays. You might coax some semblance of a smile out of them with the new iPod Nano ($169.99 at www.apple.ca), or Twilight Scene It ($34.99 at www.toysrus.ca). If you suspect she's too cool for mainstream movies, play it safe with a Rock Chick bath set from Lush ($11.99 at www.lush.ca). And there's always the Personal Soundtrack Shirt ($29.99 US at www.thinkgeek.com), which features a speaker embedded in the chest that plays sound effects (drum roll, cat call whistle, etc) on command.
*Please note that none of the above will induce teens to sing carols.